A rose by any other name…

Ah yes. A rose by any other name would smell as sweet – at least according to Bill. But, I’m not so sure that replacing all terms in the English language would have the same non-effect. Because right now, I am laughing so hard after just cleaning out my email spam box. I try to check it regularly since occassionally messages from new people wind up there because the addresses haven’t been cleared. Of course, a LOT of spam winds up there too. But that’s not why I’m laughing.

Apparently, a couple of days ago I wound up with a lot of ummm… lengthening advertisements. And though I write and read erotic romance, there were some new terms that – until I read through my spam – I had never considered using when referring to a man’s device. But I try to keep an open mind and thought before I just dismissed them out of hand, I should at least give them a try. So below I’ve taken some lines out of my own writing and inserted the new terms – just in case.

The partially opened sleeping bag had just enough give in it for her to raise her body up and position the head of his warrior of love at her entrance.

The head of his love weapon pushed at her entrance.With a gasp, she reached for his male machine.

With her fingertips, she traced his male meat from base to tip through his jeans.

She rode his massive erectile organ with abandon.

The change in position pushed his champion third leg in deeper. 

She murmured his name again, his enormous monster phallus hardening as her breath fanned over his skin.

She moved, hot and wet, against his enlarged ding-dong.

He filled her, stretched her with every pounding thrust of his anaconda-sized trouser snake.

Well…maybe I could use one or two in my next book – if I stop laughing long enough to type.

Eve